Trying very hard to mentally overpower anhedonia. The word might be kind of dramatic, I guess. I'm having a hard time getting the motivation to move. Once I do move I'm all good, I feel great, and I'm filled with a deep love and enthusiasm for the world around me.
In a perfect world, I'd be able to wake up early and hit the road for my daily workout, and that would set me up for the day. It's just so tough to do that. And I can't totally explain why.
So one mile late tonight under a beautiful clear sky, with great views of the constellations. Made me want to run longer, but this late at night I know that isn't smart. My grandfather used to tell me that nothing good happens between 11pm and 4am. I mean, of course that's not totally true, but being raised with that idea makes me less likely to take my chances on the road in the middle of the night.
Daughter #2 was super engaged today. I sang a bunch of songs to her, made a bunch of sounds and could see her looking at me, hinting towards a smile, and absorbing all of the sounds. So exciting, but I feel like the first month went by faster this time. So, it was a little easier, but also tough with that feeling that time is fleeting.
Father's day is this weekend, so we're planning a big day out to the carousel, and at home with our little family. I've been doing sensory play with shaving cream at our kitchen table for Daughter #1, so maybe we'll do that. It's such a blast to give her a time where she can be a truly raucous and messy toddler, which is sort of the nature of toddlers.
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