Days that pass too quickly

*****

My wife and I have been in awe of how quickly our child has been growing, and it is something we are both a bit sad about. I know that my daughter will only be this young once. There are a lot of fun things about a baby, aside from the late nights that come along with the age, there is also a very neat interaction that comes from being so close to a person so early in their development. We have gotten to feel tremendous gratitude as she starts focusing on things, reveling in her smiles, her early giggles and coos. We both felt a real relief that she smiles whenever she goes into the nursery to be changed -- she is in love with all the elephants in there.

I can't help but feel like maybe the depression we went through after coming home, and the rush to get back to work, and the sleeplessness cost me some bit of enjoyment in the experience. I can say I did the absolute best I could through this phase. I worked to support my partner and child whether I was home or not. I asked for help when I had to (and I wish I had asked sooner.)

We will do this again in our lives, I'm sure. We will have the experience of seeing another small person through this period of early development, and once again we'll be faced with the exhaustion and stress and the challenges of savoring the experience in spite of all those things.

I am excited to continue to be a part of this little person's life -- I am excited for the richer interactions that will come with more developed cognitive function. I can't wait to see who she becomes.

We've moved on from playing on the ground and tummy time to the addition of a bouncy chair. It has a bunch of flashing lights and gizmos designed for gross motor development, and so far it has been a lot of fun for the little one. My goal has become to get some video of her laughing -- but that has been tough because she is so fixated on that little blue snail that is stationary.

Running-wise things are going well. I am about 23 miles into this week and starting to really feel ready for my upcoming races. It helps that it has been in the high 60s here in New England, so I'm able to start shaking the winter cobwebs out and getting some speed added back to my running. It is starting to hit me that I'll actually be travelling out to California in another month -- I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little conflicted. I'm not wild about the idea of leaving my wife and four month old for three days. But I won't necessarily get the chance to run Big Sur again, so you have to go when the lottery calls.